This morning my head exploded.
Seriously. If you were one of the unfortunate souls to have read this blog this morning, you might have thought I was ready to become Buddhist and hope my next life was that of a cockroach, because it would have at least been one step above this one.
(since I’m typing this I’m sure you’ve figured out that I happen to be addicted to hyperbole – don’t worry; I’m on the patch)
Krissi and I went on a cruise a week ago, and it was wonderful. I got the sleep I have needed for some time. Going back to work on Tuesday was a different matter. The combination of 10 days of peace followed by homework, my job, and the other stresses of life hit me like a sledgehammer. Do you know what happens to an ice cube when it’s put in a glass of hot liquid?
It cracks.
And Krissi is even worse. Her large class load has made getting together for anything other than damage control (one/both of us venting/crying/collapsing/yelling). These have been some hard, hard days for our relationship, and our lives in general. This morning, except for the knowledge that God’s grace is sufficient to cover even my stupidity, I would have questioned the whole enchilada.
Thankfully, I know God works in seasons. However, much in me wants to adopt an old jock mentality (keep your head down and run until your legs fall off, play hurt) instead of throwing myself before God’s mercy. Why? It sounds harder, but actually, it’s easier. Because I don’t just sit at God’s feet and wait for Him to say, “Mercy has been granted! You may now resume your less-stressful life!” I have to keep moving.
I know I’ll get through this. We will get through this. But I never want to live this way again.
Lord have mercy. Christ have mercy.
Seriously. If you were one of the unfortunate souls to have read this blog this morning, you might have thought I was ready to become Buddhist and hope my next life was that of a cockroach, because it would have at least been one step above this one.
(since I’m typing this I’m sure you’ve figured out that I happen to be addicted to hyperbole – don’t worry; I’m on the patch)
Krissi and I went on a cruise a week ago, and it was wonderful. I got the sleep I have needed for some time. Going back to work on Tuesday was a different matter. The combination of 10 days of peace followed by homework, my job, and the other stresses of life hit me like a sledgehammer. Do you know what happens to an ice cube when it’s put in a glass of hot liquid?
It cracks.
And Krissi is even worse. Her large class load has made getting together for anything other than damage control (one/both of us venting/crying/collapsing/yelling). These have been some hard, hard days for our relationship, and our lives in general. This morning, except for the knowledge that God’s grace is sufficient to cover even my stupidity, I would have questioned the whole enchilada.
Thankfully, I know God works in seasons. However, much in me wants to adopt an old jock mentality (keep your head down and run until your legs fall off, play hurt) instead of throwing myself before God’s mercy. Why? It sounds harder, but actually, it’s easier. Because I don’t just sit at God’s feet and wait for Him to say, “Mercy has been granted! You may now resume your less-stressful life!” I have to keep moving.
I know I’ll get through this. We will get through this. But I never want to live this way again.
Lord have mercy. Christ have mercy.
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